c'mon cr-v

yes officer, you can pull me over. i swear i was going 80 and not 97. i don't think my car can even go that fast. we're going to the hot pots. i shouldn't have said that. we're going to visit our sick grandmother. i shouldn't be wearing this beanie and wolf coat. we don't party sir. five miles til our exit. good thing i paid that parking ticket. yeah you can act like that tool of a motorcycle cop that i didn't notice trying to pull me over, who could while listening to rihanna anyway? how dare he even pull me over while my favorite song is playing. no, i won't pull over till my song is over. sure i'll take that seatbelt ticket sir, but no i will not put my seatbelt on. sure i'll take this speeding ticket highway patrolman. no, i will not tell my dad. i will try not to eat it and spit it out. i will pay it on the last day possible. you will ruin my christmas. or my bringing christmas, rather. highway patrol and motorcycle cops don't mess around. yes i will go to traffic school. no i will not speed anymore, so stop following me so close dammit!

yes car, you may start after ten seconds of dying noises. yes closest gas station you may be out of gas. no car, you cannot make it on that highway. no car, you can't even make it down the street. yes anna, you may rummage nearby sheds, find a gas can, and walk to the only other gas station in mapleton. no you cannot call your mom. good thing you stole allisons ipod today, and good thing she has pink friday. and good thing mapleton is a tiny town, and you're not in silver city. and good thing you look really sketchy right now.

yes tire, you may be flat. you may be one hundred percent flat today. yes i will open my car door and run my thigh into the corner. check out that bruise. hey dad.. i've got a flat tire. yes, my tires are under warranty, yes my new tire was free.

should i continue to drive? do i want to find out what's next in my bad car luck?

i really don't know.